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[Movie Review] ‘Fifty Shades Darker’ is Heavy on Cheese and Light on Kink

fiftyshadesdarker_postertgofLet’s be honest with one another–the Fifty Shades series is an easy target for snarky critics. There’s not much of a challenge in sitting down and pinpointing every illogical turn the movie takes and every laughable line of dialogue uttered by actors who seem as tickled about what they are saying as we are hearing it. It’s hard to take a breath, collect oneself and approach a movie like Fifty Shades Darker and pick out why you should see it–and trust me, no one involved has made it easy.

For every one thing good you can say about James Foley’s film there are a handful more pushing into the spotlight to ruining it for the rest of us. Yet we march on–Fifty Shades Darker picks up shortly after the first film as Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan) continues to creepily pine for the plain Jane, Anastasia (Dakota Johnson). After a half-hearted attempt to brush him off, Anastasia agrees to meet with Christian to renegotiate the terms of their “arrangement”. As they embark on their new relationship Christian’s past and Anastasia’s vanilla sex appeal proves to be a little more complicated than they anticipated.  (more…)

Movie Review: Fifty Shades of Grey

fiftyshadesofgrey_posterI am just one of many husbands or boyfriends who spent their Valentine’s Day weekend engaging in some saucy cinematic shenanigans. I then battled back and forth with rather or not it would be worth it for me to sit and write out my thoughts on those cinematic shenanigans. For one, I questioned if I would be fair since the content in question doesn’t really target my demographic. Secondly, I was worried that I would forfeit any remaining “dude cred” by reporting back the unthinkable- that I didn’t completely hate the experience. The saucy cinematic shenanigans in question is none other than FIFTY SHADES OF GREY, the literary phenomenon that started as Twilight fanfiction which then took to assault the sexual fantasies of countless housewives and hopeless romantics around the world. I for one can’t speak to the book’s ability to stimulate the nether regions of it’s readers, but the movie- for all the hate it will attract- is not without its charms.

The dilemma for me reviewing FIFTY SHADES OF GREY is that since seeing it all I’ve said to people is, “it’s not nearly as bad as I thought it’d be.” Of course I had no idea what to even expect, I just know all the hateful backlash since the books met popularity had me expecting something pretty hideous. It’s also not a glowing recommendation to say, “it’s not the worst thing I’ve ever see,” or, “I’d watch it over any of the TWILIGHT movies-” all things that I’ve been saying when people confront me about what I thought. That all being said, it’s all still very true- it isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever seen and I’d gladly watch it over a single one of the TWILIGHT movies.  (more…)